Thursday, September 30, 2010

11 is the new 16.

So...let me start by saying that I'm pretty sure I need a drink.  I am not old enough to have to have The Conversation.  And since she still plays with Barbies and Polly Pockets and American Girl dolls, I'm pretty sure that Abby is not old enough to have The Conversation.  And by "The Conversation," I mean The Conversation.  I think you know what The Conversation is, so I won't detail what it involves..  Yo Abs is 10 (although she told me this week that she is almost 11, which I guess is the new 16).  So that begs the questions...is 11 the magic age to get a boyfriend?  And is a boyfriend at 11 still someone you sit next to at lunch or has it gotten to be more than that? 

And that begs the question...when do you start having The Conversation?

This week.  This week we had The Conversation.

It was and abbreviated Conversation; we talked about boyfriends (she can have one when she's 37) and going to school dances (she can go with a group of friends) and if there's a Sadie Hawkins Dance (girls ask the boys) we'll cross that bridge when we get there. I want her to feel like she's in charge and knowledgeable. Knowledge is power and I need to know that I'm giving her the tools to make good decisions and I really want her to be comfortable coming to me if she has questions or concerns.

In theory.

In reality, I would rather mix a cocktail and not have that conversationn, and send her over to Sars to have The Conversation. Sars is a nurse and that means she has the knoweldge to pass on in a No-Nonsense Conversation. Because, honest to God, it is not comfortable! But I sucked it up and took one for the team. I put on my own No-Nonsense face and attempted to put a "This is the most common thing in the world to be sitting on the couch having this conversation" spin on the "This is so uncomfortable and mildly weird to be having this conversation with a little girl" conversation.

I'm changing diapers and getting excited about sleeping through the night. I'm not ready for boys to pick her up at the door (and to bail Uriah out of jail because he's waiting at said door with a rifle pointed at the lad). I'm not ready to not go to sleep because I'm waiting for her to come home from a night out with friends. So, we'll have The Conversation again and again and again.

I will get her graduated from high school.

I will get her graduated from college.

And then I will breath a sigh of relief.  And have my cocktail.  Because I will have succeeded in the goals that we set for her when she came to live with is 2 years ago.

P.S. Pretty damn glad Finn is a boy. Uriah gets to have That Conversation with him!

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