Monday, June 4, 2012

Funny naked baby.

Uriah told me I’m not that funny anymore.  And my question to him was this: Was I ever funny?  Immediately followed by: Wait, don’t tell me.  I don’t want to know. 

Because here’s the thing, I don’t think I ever was really that funny.  Sarcastic, yes.  Borderline inappropriate, usually.  But funny?  I don’t know…probably not.

I get that I’ve been pretty vanilla here lately.  I’ve lost my sense of writing direction.  Finding out that Abby’s little friends found my blog has made me put on some of the share-all brakes.  The truth is, knowing that she occasionally reads this and might not always get my sense of humor (God bless the girl, but she just really doesn’t understand the concept of sarcasm.  She takes everything so personally.) makes me re-think the things I'd normally tell you about her (because she does funny stuff.  Annoying stuff, too, but some of her annoying stuff is funny.)And to be perfectly honest, this whole single-parenting gig that I’ve been doing lately isn’t really that fun or funny. 

Okay, maybe a little funny, but only in retrospect, never usually in the moment when I'm ready to pull my hair out.  Yesterday Finn decided it was Naked Day and he ran around the house for about half an hour in the morning with his little baby buns airing out.  And he’s a quick little devil, too.  There is nothing more exasperating than making sure your son doesn’t learn that he can pee without his diaper on when your whole house is wall to wall carpet (Dumbest idea ever, elderly couple who lived her before us.  What compelled you to put carpet in a kitchen and a bathroom?!  Gross.).  It was kind of funny to see his little white behind streaking all over the house and these days I’ll take my humor where I can get it.

Dear Food Network:

I’d like to pitch an idea:  Cooking in the Raw with Finneaus.
His recipe box includes classics such as: "nutbutter and jewy" and "goldshish" and "pie.
It’ll be a big hit with the pre-school crowd, I’m sure.


Have your people call my people.

2 comments:

  1. Well, we may have lost touch for a few years, but, I've known you longer than Uriah. And you're d**n funny. You make me laugh, and you always have. Love the censor clipped on! :D

    Good luck and keep you're sanity on the single parenting thing...I only have to do it for a few days at a time. Keep the faith and pass the gin! :)

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  2. I wish we didn't have to censor baby tushes. I mean seriously? What's cuter, besides puppies and kittens? But I gotta say, that pitch for your new cooking show? I've seen where my son's hands go. And IT.AIN'T. PRETTY. Especially when he's nekkkked and free to put those hands anywhere without the barrier of clothing. Just sayin'. hehe

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